We all have soul-limiting beliefs which don't serve us. Beliefs which have been built up over time through formative-years-messaging, cliches, media and more. And sometimes, our personal experiences back them up, and when they do we say, "Aha! I was right!"

"Girls don't like me," was one of mine in high school. So I would go out of my way to distance myself from the girls, because at least then I wouldn't have to deal with an internal 'I told you so!' when we fell out.

"I don't fit into office environments," was another. Again, I would make sure I arrived only-just on-time for work, and would sit outside alone during my lunch break, have my headphones on at my desk, and leave the office as soon as possible at the end of the day. No chance for the tribe to exhile me if I was already removing myself from the equation.

"I am never chosen," in romantic entanglements is one which I've been working on consistently since I was a teen. I would put my beloved first at every possible opportunity, being the one to put their needs ahead of mine, to text first, to open up first, to make the other feel as comfortable and safe as possible, because that's all I really wanted for myself. 'What better way to show love than to sacrifice the self?' I thought.

Only when I was doing that, I was removing the possibility for the Universe, my friends, my co-workers, and my lovers to prove me wrong. To like me, to welcome me, to CHOOSE me.

So I find myself returning, time and time again, to my 6 most effective ways to overcome soul-limiting beliefs...

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1) Identify what they are. Your beliefs could relate to money, your body, your relationship, family situation, work opportunities and everything in between. Usually, they crop up without us even noticing and are rooted in our own internal protection mechanism. For example, if we have a spark of inspiration which tells us we'd love to go solo travelling for a month, we may hear, "That's not safe" because we were taught as children that women are only safe if they have the protection of a man. If we decide we'd like to write a novel in the evenings instead of waste time scrolling on our phones, we might hear, "Who do you think you are?" because we have told ourselves for years that our dyslexia means we will never write well. Or if we set a body goal we might hear, "Just be happy with what you've got," because we have tried before and failed. Call out these messages as soon as they pop up and dig in, to find out what is the soul-limiting belief beneath the surface.

2) Investigate where they come from. Soul-limiting beliefs can come from anywhere, but once we are able to recognise their origins we are often able to pick them apart more easily. Is your soul-limiting belief a word-for-word reprimand that your mother or a teacher or a bully used to give you? Does your soul-limiting belief have roots in an ancestral pattern or story we've seen play out in our family lineage, or in our cultural background perhaps? Or is it anchored in by a trauma or wound we've experienced in our lives so far? Maybe it is based on a message you've seen or heard in the media (this often applies to beauty standards), in politics (this can pertain to finances, class levels or housing), or in art (for example, relationships and careers are usually portrayed a certain way in film)?

3) Find evidence to the contrary. The next step is asking ourselves if the soul-limiting belief is true or not. For example, I have recently been working on a soul-limiting belief which has presented as a fear to launch a new project. The underlying belief is, "You will fail because you fail at everything." This is rooted in one very specific 'failure' I experienced when I made the decision to close my yoga studio in 2021. Is it true that I will fail, because I fail at everything? No. Firstly because I can't tell the future, so I can't definitively say that I will fail. And secondly, because there is plenty that I have not 'failed' at in life... For example, navigating pregnancy solo, training as a yoga instructor, securing corporate contracts etc. List the evidence and build a case against your soul-limiting beliefs.

4) Affirmations, baby. Once we know that our soul-limiting beliefs are not real, we can start crafting some better-feeling-thoughts by creating affirmations to the contrary. That said, fake it 'til you make it will only get you so far and a big part of this process is about building a sense of self-trust, so for example, if you're soul-limiting belief is, 'I will always be poor', it may feel like you're lying to yourself if you choose "I am rich" as your affirmation. Instead, try something like, "I have the potential to change my money story," or "I have everything I need within to earn my dream income," or "I am working towards clearing my debt." Once you have your affirmations, recite them regularly... In the car, before bed, first thing in the morning, in your journal, in the voice memos of your phone, on your steamy shower screen. Everywhere.

5) Take the courage to let the Universe prove you wrong. This is the scary bit; doing the work daily without any confirmation that things are going to work out. This is the surrender piece, the part where we get out of our own way and know that the inspired action is our responsibility but the outcome is not. It is nerve-wracking to jump when we don't know if there's a safety net, but the safety net will NEVER catch us if we don't jump, right? For me at the moment, this means getting out there and dating even though my soul-limiting belief is telling me that 'all of the good men are gone'. I'm not giving up, I'm breaking down those intrusive thoughts, finding evidence to the contrary, practicing my affirmations and getting out there. So far, no luck, but at least I'm meeting people in the process, and I know that it is worth the risk for the tiniest glimmer of hope that there may be someone out there looking for me right now too!

6) Rinse, repeat. So I've got to be honest here. You're going to fall on your face. Especially in the beginning. You may do all of this work, and only feel that the evidence supporting your soul-limiting belief is growing. You may believe that you need to 'lower your standards' on finding your dream home because 'the dream home doesn't exist' and then spend another six months holding the faith and visiting house after house after house only to be disappointed at every turn. But if your intuition is telling you to keep fighting for the dream, you absolutely MUST go back to the drawing board and reinvestigate your soul-limiting beliefs. Do a little more work, create some new affirmations, and return to your search with renewed energy. Hold the faith. Everything you desire exists in this world, and when you are ready to receive it, you will: your only job is to get ready.

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The unknown is such an uncomfortable place to be in, especially when we feel that the outcome is out of our control. But the fact of that matter is, that when our soul-limiting beliefs involve other people (or the Universe, which they all do!), at least one half of that outcome is ALWAYS out of our control. Learning to be ok with that is called inter-dependence and is honestly synonymous with 'freedom'.

So check in with your soul-limiting beliefs today, and suspend them. Pause, let yourself feel uncomfortable, wait for the Universe to weave the net in which to catch you. Self-regulate and be kind to your inner child while you give the Universe chance to prove you wrong.

We've got this ❤️

With grace and grit,

Gabriella x